Ngoại ngữ Writing

[Lê Khánh Chi]

[TẶNG BẠN] TRỌN BỘ Bí kíp học tốt 08 môn
Chắc suất Đại học top - Giữ chỗ ngay!!

ĐĂNG BÀI NGAY để cùng trao đổi với các thành viên siêu nhiệt tình & dễ thương trên diễn đàn.

Các bạn sửa giúp mình bài này với
<<Sửa cả lỗi ngữ pháp, chính tả, ý nghĩa, nếu ý nào ko hay hoặc thiếu ý gì thì các bạn bổ sung giúp mình với>>.

Đề: Write a short paragraph about one of leisure activities you like most. Why do you like it?​

In my freetime, I enjoy surfing the Internet. It has many benefits to me. It's not only helps me relax but also provides me with many useful knowledges. I love the time that I can sitting in front of a computer and watching the things I like. I can watching some funny videos, listenning to music..It helps me reduce stess after a long day. Besides, surfing the Internet can help me make more friends by chatting in some websites. Although they are not my real friends but they are very good. They always give me good advices, good tips to help me overcome difficulties in my life. In short, surfing the Internet is an important part of my life and it helps me love my life more.

 

[Phuong Vi]

In my freetime, I enjoy surfing the Internet. It has many benefits to me. It not only helps me relax but also provides me with many useful knowledge ( knowledge không đếm được). I love the time that I can sit ( sau can V nguyên mẫu) in front of a computer and watch the things I like. I can watch some funny videos, listen to music..It helps me reduce stress after a hard-working day. Besides, surfing the Internet is only the effective way to make more friends by chatting in some websites. Although they are not my real friends but they are very good. They always give me useful advices, good tips to help me overcome difficulties in my life. In short, surfing the Internet is an important part of my life and it helps me love my life more.

 

[Nha Trang quê hương]

In my freetime , I enjoy surfing the Internet . It has many benefits to me . It's not only helps me relax but also provides me with many useful knowledges . I love the time that I can sitting in front of a computer and watching the things I like . I can watching some funny videos , listenning to music . It helps me reduce stess after a long day . Besides , surfing the Internet can help me make more friends by chatting in some websites . Although they are not my real friends but they are very good . They always give me good advices , good tips to help me overcome difficulties in my life . In short , surfing the Internet is an important part of my life and it helps me love my life more .

 

[phuongdaitt1]

Đề: Write a short paragraph about one of leisure activities you like most. Why do you like it?​

In my freetime, I enjoy surfing the Internet. It has many benefits to me. It not only helps me relax but also provides me with many useful knowledge. I love the moment that I can sit in front of a computer and watch things I like. I can watch some funny videos, listen to music..It helps me reduce stress after a long day. Besides, surfing the Internet helps me make more friends by chatting on some websites. Although they are not my real friends, they are very good. They always give me useful advice, tips to help me overcome any difficulties in my life. In short, surfing the Internet is an important part of my life and it helps me love my life more.
Nhận xét
Can + V1 vì can là động từ khiếm khuyết
Sử dụng quá nhiều từ "help"
Đã có although thì ko có but
Knowledge ko đếm đc
Sai chính tả từ stress

 

[ngochaad]

Các bạn sửa giúp mình bài này với
<<Sửa cả lỗi ngữ pháp, chính tả, ý nghĩa, nếu ý nào ko hay hoặc thiếu ý gì thì các bạn bổ sung giúp mình với>>.

Đề: Write a short paragraph about one of leisure activities you like most. Why do you like it?​

In my freetime, I enjoy surfing the Internet. It has many benefits to me. It's not only helps me relax but also provides me with many useful knowledges. I love the time that I can sitting in front of a computer and watching the things I like. I can watching some funny videos, listenning to music..It helps me reduce stess after a long day. Besides, surfing the Internet can help me make more friends by chatting in some websites. Although they are not my real friends but they are very good. They always give me good advices, good tips to help me overcome difficulties in my life. In short, surfing the Internet is an important part of my life and it helps me love my life more.

In my freetime, I enjoy surfing the Internet. It has many benefits to me. It's ( chủ ngữ chỉ là It thôi ) not only helps me relax but also provides me with many useful knowledges ( knowledge ko đếm đc nha, ban tham khảo https://diendan.hocmai.vn/threads/40-danh-tu-khong-bao-gio-chia-so-nhieu-trong-tieng-anh.692797/). I love the time that I can sitting ( can + V nguyên thể ) in front of a computer and watching the things I like. I can watching some funny videos, listenning to music..It helps me reduce stess strees after a long day. Besides, surfing the ( ko có the) Internet can help me make more friends by chatting in some websites. Although they are not my real friends but they are very good. They always give me good advices, good tips to help me overcome difficulties in my life. In short, surfing the Internet is an important part of my life and it helps me love my life more
#phuongdaitt1
Surfing the internet ổn mà em ?

 

[Lê Khánh Chi]

Đề: Write a short paragraph about one of leisure activities you like most. Why do you like it?In my freetime, I enjoy surfing the Internet. It has many benefits to me. It not only helps me relax but also provides me with many useful knowledge. I love the moment that I can sit in front of a computer and watch things I like. I can watch some funny videos, listen to music..It helps me reduce stress after a long day. Besides, surfing the Internet helps me make more friends by chatting on some websites. Although they are not my real friends, they are very good. They always give me useful advices, tips to help me overcome any difficulties in my life. In short, surfing the Internet is an important part of my life and it helps me love my life more.
Nhận xét
Can + V1 vì can là động từ khiếm khuyết
Sử dụng quá nhiều từ "help"
Đã có although thì ko có but
Knowledge ko đếm đc
Sai chính tả từ stress

Mình có thể thay "help" bằng từ gì để đỡ lặp?????

 

[tuananh982]

Ngoài ra bạn tham khảo thêm các từ nối để đa dạng hóa lối viết nha!
https://diendan.hocmai.vn/threads/linking-words-you-should-know.689070/

 

[Lê Khánh Chi]

Bài viết của mình cần bổ sung thêm ý gì nữa ko??????

Thay thế như thế nào cho ko lặp nữa, giúp mk với

 

[ĐứcHoàng2017]

Các bạn sửa giúp mình bài này với
<<Sửa cả lỗi ngữ pháp, chính tả, ý nghĩa, nếu ý nào ko hay hoặc thiếu ý gì thì các bạn bổ sung giúp mình với>>.

Đề: Write a short paragraph about one of leisure activities you like most. Why do you like it?​

In my freetime, I enjoy surfing the Internet. It has many benefits to me. It's not only helps me relax but also provides me with many useful knowledges. I love the time that I can sitting in front of a computer and watching the things I like. I can watching some funny videos, listenning to music..It helps me reduce stess after a long day. Besides, surfing the Internet can help me make more friends by chatting in some websites. Although they are not my real friends but they are very good. They always give me good advices, good tips to help me overcome difficulties in my life. In short, surfing the Internet is an important part of my life and it helps me love my life more.

Can + Vinf nhé bạn
Đã có although thì không dùng but nhé
Knowledge không đếm được
lặp từ nhiều
sai chính tả stess -> stress

 

[Phuong Vi]

surfing the ( ko có the) Internet

Vẫn có the nha bạn

 

[phuongdaitt1]

Mình có thể thay "help" bằng từ gì để đỡ lặp?????

Bạn có thể thay bằng cấu trúc
Make sb adj/v1
Ex: it helps me reduce stress after a long day
It makes me reduce stress after a long day