Hobby (Bạn có thể dùng a/the hobby) is the activity you like to do the most. And for me, making models is the most way to spend a relaxing time and relax. Making models mean you make a replicas (phải là a replica hoặc replicas) very like a real object but in small size. I started this hobby when I was 4 years old. I think in => at this age start the same hobby is very soon but I think this hobby is easy. When you start this hobby, you should try to make simple models. I recommend you should start with models like aircraft, ship, armoured car, ... You can buy a models (bạn phải dùng a model hoặc models,không dược dùng mạo từ mới số nhiều) in the shop near your house and your neighbourhood. You must have a much time to do this hobby. For one models, you must spend one week or more to finish. Many details you assembling very carefully. If you make one details wrong, you will make models again. When you have much many experiences, you can make more difficult models like aircraft (Bạn phải dùng the/an aircraft) carrier, spaceship,... But in this paragraph, I will talk about the/a spaceship. The/a Spaceship is the most popular model. You can take an idea from many science-fiction films like star war, star trek,... I think everyone knows those film so I think we can take an idea so easy. Or If you have a good imagination you can think of/about a new model. That so great because you will very fun when you finish the models. Because from a little piece of the model you make it to a fabulous model. You can collect the/a model to have a model collection. This hobby is/was very useful. You will be careful and meticulous If you continue this hobby. You can show your collection to your friend. I think I will continue this hobby. I will end this paragraph in here. Goodbye.
Nhận xét : Nói Chung là bạn làm ổn,nhưng :
- Bài viết lủng củng,không lạc mạch,rõ ràng
- Mạo từ a/an sẽ không đi với danh từ số nhiều
- Có vài trường hợp trong bài luận trên thì phải có mạo từ hoặc giới từ đứng trước danh từ.
Good job! Có lên bạn nhé ^^
Anh xin phép sửa thêm vào bài sửa của em xíu nhé, do có sẵn nên sửa vào luôn cho tiện
Hobby (Bạn có thể dùng
a/the hobby) is the activity you like to do the most. And for me, making models is the most way to spend
a relax
ing time and relax. Making models
mean => means (making models là 1 hoạt động nên dùng số ít) you make a replicas (phải là
a replica hoặc replicas) very like a real object but in small size. I started this hobby when I was 4 years old. I think
in => at this age
start => starting (starting the same hobby ở đây dùng như 1 danh từ) the same hobby is very soon but I think this hobby is easy. When you start this hobby, you should try to make simple models. I recommend you should start with models like aircraft, ship, armoured car, ... You can buy a models
(bạn phải dùng a model hoặc models,không dược dùng mạo từ mới số nhiều) in the shop near your house and your neighbourhood.
You must have a much time to do this hobby (câu này nếu là mình sẽ sẽ ghi "you have to spend much time on this hobby"). For one model
s, you must spend one week or more
to finish = finishing (spend + ving ) . Many details you assembling very carefully. If you make
one details wrong, you will
make models (để tránh lặp thì chỗ này nên dùng it/ them tùy thuộc vế trược dùng số ít hay nhiều) again. When you have much
many experiences, you can make more difficult models like aircraft
(Bạn phải dùng the/an aircraft) carrier, spaceship,... But in this paragraph, I will talk about
the/a spaceship.
The/a Spaceship is the most popular model. You can take
an idea from many science-fiction film
s like star war, star trek,... I think everyone know
s those films (those phải đi với số nhiều) so I think we can take
an idea so easy. Or If you have a good imagination you can think
of/about a new model.
That's so great (thêm tobe trước tính từ nhé) because
you will very fun (nên ghi là will have fun) when you finish the models. Because from a little piece of
the model you make it to a fabulous model. You can collect
the/a model to have a model collection. This hobby
is/was (chỗ này chỉ được dùng is thôi nha) very useful. You will be careful and meticulous If you continue this hobby. You can show your collection to your friend. I think I will continue this hobby. I will end this paragraph
in (bỏ in đi nha) here. Goodbye.
P.s : màu xanh là mình chữa cho bạn, còn màu đen của bạn ở trên nhé. Bạn cần xem lại số ít/ số nhiều, tobe... Nói chung bài luận này không ổn lắm, bạn tự sửa hoặc viết lại bài mới rồi đăng lên cho mọi mình xem lại cho nhé
[TẶNG BẠN] TRỌN BỘ Bí kíp học tốt 08 môn
