In Vietnam, traffic problems are very serious. There more than 30 deaths by traffic problems every day. It is as big as deaths of plague. In fact, accident in traffic is a problem we can’t avoid but there are too many deaths in Vietnam so it is very serious and government must solve. So why is it happen? Well, I think there are 2 reasons. First, road in Vietnam is so narrow and bumpy. Moreover, you can see the hole in everywhere. Some bridges are very dangerous and it can collapse. There is warning sign but trucks cross that bridge. So people will in danger. In this reason, we can understand because Vietnam isn’t a rich country so government don’t have enough money to update road. We only have one way, it’s improve road. Second, many young people ride vehicles very dangerous. Why I use word “vehicles”? Cause some young people ride motorbike. It is very dangerous and it is illegal. But it is just minority, but many young people ride bicycle very dangerous is true. They ride bike so fast and they never see traffic lights. They also loading car and make others position. We can teach they about traffic laws and how to avoid traffic jams. I hope you will read this essay and do advice in this essay because it will make our traffic safer. Thank you and good bye!
Tớ xin chỉnh lại theo phong cách formal paragraph:
In Vietnam, traffic problems are very serious. There
are more than 30 deaths of traffic
accidents every day.
They're as
many as
the number of deaths of plague (
OR: Traffic accidents are as serious as a plague). In fact, accident
S in traffic
ARE a problem we can’t avoid but there are
too so many deaths in Vietnam
that it is very serious and
the government must solve. So why
do traffic accidents happen? Well, I think there are 2 reasons. First,
the road
s in Vietnam
are so narrow and bumpy. Moreover, you can see hole
s in everywhere. Some bridges are very dangerous
and because it
may collapse. There
are warning sign
s but
trucks vehicles still cross that bridge,
so people will
be in danger.
Because of this reason, we can understand
that Vietnam isn’t a rich country so
the government do
esn’t have enough money to
update road improve the quality of roads, but that's the only way. We only have one way, it’s improve road. Second, many young people
ride vehicles travel very d
angerously.
Why I use word “vehicles”? Cause some young people ride motorbike. It is very dangerous and it is illegal (1).
It is just
the minority, but
that many young people (2) ride
bicycles carelessly is true. They ride
their bikes so fast
that they never see traffic lights.
They also loading car and make others position(3).
Therefore, we
should teach
them about traffic laws and how to avoid traffic
accidents.
I hope you will read this essay and do advice in this essay because it will make our traffic safer. Thank you and good bye!(4)
(1):
Some of them ride their motorbikes carelessly and may cause accidents. (motorbike không có bị cấm)
(2): Hạn chế lặp từ không quan trọng. Viết lại:
that many young adults/ minors/ ...
(3): Mình không hiểu đoạn này :3
(4): Đối với những topic nói về vấn đề chung của xã hội, không nên sử dụng ngôi thứ hai (
you) vì nó giống như chỉ nói về người chấm. Nên dùng đại từ rộng hơn (
we).
Không chào hỏi hay tạm biệt hay cảm ơn như văn nói trong văn viết. Chỉ cần kết luận lại vấn đề là xong.
Viết lại (gần nghĩa nhất):
I hope everyone will follow traffic laws and travel safely because it'll make everyone's journeys much safer.
Viết lại: (theo tớ)
In conclusion, we should raise public awareness of road safety in order to ensure a safe journey for everyone.
[TẶNG BẠN] TRỌN BỘ Bí kíp học tốt 08 môn
