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| Scan the article and give brief answers to the questions below. |
All that’s left is A BAND OF GOLD
California, as we all know, is a land prone to earthquakes, in which the
ground splits asunder beneath one’s feet and one is likely to lose one’s
bearings. Luckily for us, such physical events do not extend far beyond that
state and we learn about disasters only through our news bulletins.
But the US, and California in particular, is a major source of dramatic psychological movements which first shake that country and then sweep eastward towards Europe. The energy of these waves may be diminished by the Atlantic crossing, but Britain absorbs the main impact. Even after the resulting waves arrive here, social changes have continuing effects in the US, extreme changes often generating a backlash or antidote which arrives here later.
Marriage and the family may have begun to come apart in the US earlier than in Britain, but the first reports of an antidote to family breakdown – family therapy – were coming ashore in the fifties when I was training, though I did not feel bold enough to get my feet wet and try it myself until 1962.
A recent swing of the pendulum in the US, still taking place, is moving not only public but professional opinion away from divorce towards the view that marriages should, if at all possible, be sustained for the sake of the children, even at the cost of the continued unhappiness of the spouses.
No doubt these changes of view will soon affect us too as the waves arrive, but in Britain nobody has reached any conclusions yet. Recent research in Britain compared those children whose parents had divorced with those whose parents had sustained an unhappy relationship. It found that in those families where the parents had split up, half of the behavioural problems of the boys, and some of the girls, were present before the divorce.
Even in the US, some experts are not following the new tide. John Gottman and other researchers suggest that children from intact homes where there is high conflict do worse in the long run than children of divorced parents, though the latter may appear more disturbed in the early years after the break-up before they ‘bounce back’.
I have outlined in a previous article Gottman’s claims to be able to predict the future success or failure of marriages with extraordinary accuracy, by observation of simple reactions such as the rise in heart rate and blood pressure during arguments.
His research has now led to some further interesting conclusions, and he challenges the commonly held view that couples who fight all the time and those who avoid conflict at any cost are the ones more at risk of marital failure. He found that in happy marriages the commonly expressed view that men are less emotionally expressive than women did not apply. His research also suggests that anger between spouses is not harmful except when it is accompanied by more lethal emotions like contempt or disgust; indeed, ‘blunt, straightforward anger seemed to immunize marriages against deterioration … disagreements and fights seem necessary in some degree in all good marriages, and avoidance of confrontation often results in avoidance of intimacy’.
Marriages, he says, ‘seem to thrive on, proportionately, a little negativity and a lot of positivity’. As to divorce, it is an unpalatable truth that some marriages cannot and should not be saved.
‘Not only do patterns of toxic marital interaction keep the body in a state of unhealthy physical arousal, they create a psychological climate of helpless misery … these bone-deep states of arousal can no longer be willingly controlled … Not only is it fatuous to suggest they just ‘try harder’ at this juncture, it may even be bad for their health – witness our data suggesting that staying in a hostile, distant marriage actually compromises the immune system, increasing susceptibility to illness.’
1. What does the writer compare the earthquakes to?
a. psychological theories
b. news bulletins
c. crossing the Atlantic
d. the institution of marriage
2. What was the writer scared to do?
a. get married
b. get divorced
c. learn about family therapy
d. encourage people to stay married
3. The phrase TO GET MY FEET WET in paragrahp 2 is closest meaning to
a. To try out
b. To have a bath
c. To wash my feet
d. To leave out
4. What do British therapists believe about family breakdown?
a. It should be avoided at all costs.
b. It should be avoided if children are involved.
c. They are undecided about its effects.
d. They are critical of the American findings.
5. Which of the following sums up the findings of recent research inBritain?
a. Boys from divorced families have more behavioural problems than girls.
b. Problems amongst children from broken homes can be present before divorce.
c. Children of unhappy parents who do not divorce have more problems.
d. Children whose parents divorce have more academic difficulties.
6. The word THEY in the last paragrahp refers to
a. The body
b. Toxic interaction
c. Bone-deep states of arousal
d. Patterns of toxic martial interactions
7. What conclusion has John Gottman reached about happy marriages?
a. Women express their angry feelings more readily.
b. There are more good times than bad times.
c. Both parents are likely to engage in fierce disagreements.
d. Issues which could lead to arguments are avoided.
8. Why might staying in a bad marriage be bad for your health?It raises the blood pressure.
a. It increases the heart rate.
b. It reduces bone density.
c. It affects the immune system.
