English THCS Opinion essay

[An.hana07]

[TẶNG BẠN] TRỌN BỘ Bí kíp học tốt 08 môn
Chắc suất Đại học top - Giữ chỗ ngay!!

ĐĂNG BÀI NGAY để cùng trao đổi với các thành viên siêu nhiệt tình & dễ thương trên diễn đàn.

Mọi người xem giúp mình bài luận này với ạ!
Write an essay of about 250 words about the following topic:
Some people think spoken communication is more powerful than written communication.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In this day and age, there is no doubt that communication is very important in human life. And some people claim that verbal communication is more effective than written communication. While i accept that verbal communication is much more effective than written communication, i believe that written communication is also very helpful in many cases.

On the one hand, it is true that to convey all information in a complete, understandable and powerful way, spoken communication is the best way. When spoken communication, we can more easily understand the other's feelings which makes it easier for us to talk and understand each other. When it comes to presidential elections, we usually think of speeches or debates. In these situations, it is not enough just to give a good speech, but they must know how to express it with convincing and enthusiastic words in order to elected.

On the other hand, written communication is also a useful way. Large businesses often receive a lot of requests or feedback from customers and they need to talk to them. In stead of having to meet each person to talk to them, we can reply to them by email, facebook and so on. By that way, we can convey information to them quickly without having to spend a lot of time. In addition, most legal matters are communicated in writing because it ensures high reliability. Because once you have sent an email message, you can not edit it anymore.

In short, although oral communication is very powerful, i am of the opinion that written communication is equally important.

 

[Trinh Linh Mai]

Mọi người xem giúp mình bài luận này với ạ!
Write an essay of about 250 words about the following topic:
Some people think spoken communication is more powerful than written communication.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In this day and age, there is no doubt that communication is very important in human life. And some people claim that verbal communication is more effective than written communication. While i accept that verbal communication is much more effective than written communication, i believe that written communication is also very helpful in many cases.

On the one hand, it is true that to convey all information in a complete, understandable and powerful way, spoken communication is the best way. When spoken communication, we can more easily understand the other's feelings which makes it easier for us to talk and understand each other. When it comes to presidential elections, we usually think of speeches or debates. In these situations, it is not enough just to give a good speech, but they must know how to express it with convincing and enthusiastic words in order to elected.

On the other hand, written communication is also a useful way. Large businesses often receive a lot of requests or feedback from customers and they need to talk to them. In stead of having to meet each person to talk to them, we can reply to them by email, facebook and so on. By that way, we can convey information to them quickly without having to spend a lot of time. In addition, most legal matters are communicated in writing because it ensures high reliability. Because once you have sent an email message, you can not edit it anymore.

In short, although oral communication is very powerful, i am of the opinion that written communication is equally important.

In this day and age, there is no doubt -> sure (sẽ ngắn gọn và hợp lí về nghĩa hơn) that communication is very important in human life. And some people claim that verbal communication is more effective than written communication. While i accept that verbal communication is much more effective than written communication, i believe that written communication is also very helpful in many cases.
=> Note: Bạn diễn đạt còn bị lặp từ hơi nhiều nên chọn những từ thay thế thì tốt hơn ạ
On the one hand, it is true that to convey all information in a complete, understandable and powerful way, spoken -> verbal (giống đoạn trên đi nha) communication is the best way. When spoken communication-> we communicate verbally (diễn đạt thêm phong phú), we can more easily understand the other's feelings which makes it easier for us to talk and understand each other. When it comes to presidential elections, we usually think of speeches or debates. In these situations, it is not enough just to give a good speech, but they must know how to express it with convincing and enthusiastic -> passionate (nghĩa của từ không hợp nên chuyển nhé) words in order to elected
=> Khá logic và hợp lí, cần lưu ý xíu thoy
On the other hand -> Besides (sử dụng khác đoạn trên), written communication is also a useful way. Large businesses often receive a lot of requests or feedback from customers and they need to talk to them. In stead of having to meet each person to talk to them, we can reply to them by email, facebook and so on. By that way, we can convey information to them quickly without having to spend a lot of time. In addition, most legal matters are communicated in writing because it ensures high reliability.<=> Because once you have sent an email message, you can not edit it anymore.
=> Hai câu cuối đoạn, k sai ngữ pháp nhưng về mặt nghĩa có chút k ổn á, còn lại thì oke
In short, although oral ->verbal communication is very powerful, i am of the opinion -> but in my opinion that written communication is equally important
Có gì mọi người góp ý thêm ạ !!!

 

[An.hana07]

In this day and age, there is no doubt -> sure (sẽ ngắn gọn và hợp lí về nghĩa hơn) that communication is very important in human life. And some people claim that verbal communication is more effective than written communication. While i accept that verbal communication is much more effective than written communication, i believe that written communication is also very helpful in many cases.
=> Note: Bạn diễn đạt còn bị lặp từ hơi nhiều nên chọn những từ thay thế thì tốt hơn ạ
On the one hand, it is true that to convey all information in a complete, understandable and powerful way, spoken -> verbal (giống đoạn trên đi nha) communication is the best way. When spoken communication-> we communicate verbally (diễn đạt thêm phong phú), we can more easily understand the other's feelings which makes it easier for us to talk and understand each other. When it comes to presidential elections, we usually think of speeches or debates. In these situations, it is not enough just to give a good speech, but they must know how to express it with convincing and enthusiastic -> passionate (nghĩa của từ không hợp nên chuyển nhé) words in order to elected
=> Khá logic và hợp lí, cần lưu ý xíu thoy
On the other hand -> Besides (sử dụng khác đoạn trên), written communication is also a useful way. Large businesses often receive a lot of requests or feedback from customers and they need to talk to them. In stead of having to meet each person to talk to them, we can reply to them by email, facebook and so on. By that way, we can convey information to them quickly without having to spend a lot of time. In addition, most legal matters are communicated in writing because it ensures high reliability.<=> Because once you have sent an email message, you can not edit it anymore.
=> Hai câu cuối đoạn, k sai ngữ pháp nhưng về mặt nghĩa có chút k ổn á, còn lại thì oke
In short, although oral ->verbal communication is very powerful, i am of the opinion -> but in my opinion that written communication is equally important
Có gì mọi người góp ý thêm ạ !!!

Bạn có thể sửa một chút về phần mở bài giúp mình với được ko, vì phần mở bài theo kiểu partly disagree mình làm thường hay bị lặp từ cực( mà mình cũng ko biết làm sao để sửa đc điểm này).
(Mấy lỗi khác mình thấy bạn sửa rất ok luôn^_^ nhưng mình muốn nói một chút về chỗ mấy từ nối mà mình sử dụng: những từ đó là mình làm theo form cô cho sẵn nên ko cần thiết lắm, nhưng mà mình cũng cảm ơn bạn nhiều ^_^.
There is no doubt that: nếu sửa thành sure thì mình nghĩ ko hợp về nghĩa cho lắm ( và họ thường dùng it is not sure that).
On the other hand: chuyển thành besides thì sẽ làm lạc đề( mặc dù dịch theo nghĩa thì cũng khá ok) vì theo phần mở bài là mình làm kiểu partly disagree nên On the other hand là để nhấn mạnh về mặt khác của vấn đề
I am of the opinion: sửa thành but in my opinion thì sẽ sai lỗi ngữ pháp mất vì ở câu trước mình có sử dụng although rồi( và tất nhiên là có although thì ko có but). Mình xin phép trích câu của bạn: (although oral ->verbal communication is very powerful, i am of the opinion -> but in my opinion that written communication is equally important)
Và câu i am of the opinion cũng tương đương (gần giống) câu i believe that rồi nên mình dùng luôn ý. Đây là câu rất hay được sử dụng trong viết luận.
Vẫn mong mọi người sửa thêm phần mở bài giúp mình với ạ!

 

[minhtam8a2@gmail.com]

Mọi người xem giúp mình bài luận này với ạ!
Write an essay of about 250 words about the following topic:
Some people think spoken communication is more powerful than written communication.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In this day and age, there is no doubt that communication is very important in human life. And some people claim that verbal communication is more effective than written communication. While i accept that verbal communication is much more effective than written communication, i believe that written communication is also very helpful in many cases.

On the one hand, it is true that to convey all information in a complete, understandable and powerful way, spoken communication is the best way. When spoken communication, we can more easily understand the other's feelings which makes it easier for us to talk and understand each other. When it comes to presidential elections, we usually think of speeches or debates. In these situations, it is not enough just to give a good speech, but they must know how to express it with convincing and enthusiastic words in order to elected.

On the other hand, written communication is also a useful way. Large businesses often receive a lot of requests or feedback from customers and they need to talk to them. In stead of having to meet each person to talk to them, we can reply to them by email, facebook and so on. By that way, we can convey information to them quickly without having to spend a lot of time. In addition, most legal matters are communicated in writing because it ensures high reliability. Because once you have sent an email message, you can not edit it anymore.

In short, although oral communication is very powerful, i am of the opinion that written communication is equally important.

Trong IELTS writing task 2, một bài viết tốt và ổn để đc band cao đó chính là phải đáp ứng đủ các điều sau:
-take response : phải trả lời hết đc các ý của đề bài, ví dụ như họ hỏi đồng ý hay không, đưa ra ví dụ cx như kinh nghiệm của bản thân thì cần phải trả lời hết các ý đó trong bài
-coherence and cohesion: giữa các câu văn cũng như các đoạn văn cần phải mang tính liên kết để cả bài viết trở thành một khối thống nhất, mạch lạc và uyển chuyển
-grammatical: áp dụng ngữ pháp chính là một trong những điều rất quan trọng IELTS writing bởi đây là công cụ hiệu quả giúp thí sinh không bị gặp phải các lỗi lặp cũng như giúp bài thi đạt được band cao hơn
-accuracy and range: khi viết cũng cần phải tránh viết lạc đề, cần hiểu rõ vấn đề để viết, không viết quá dài hoặc quá ngắn so với phạm vi của đề
Nếu thiếu sót một trong 4 yếu tố trên sẽ có khả năng mất 1/4 số điểm.

In this day and age, there is no doubt that communication is very important in human life. And=> Không dùng vì ko phải là liên từ, bỏ để đúng và câu văn ngắn gọn some people claim that verbal communication =>socialization network is more effective than written communication(*). While I accept verbal communication is much more effective than written communication=> one, i believe that written communication=> writting contact is also very helpful in many cases.(Bổ sung một sô ví dụ cũng như kinh nghiệm bản thân)
Đồng thời nên sử dụng câu bị động ở chỗ đánh (*) để nhấn mạnh sự việc đc nói đến nhiều hơn nhé

On the one hand, it is true that to convey all information in a complete, understandable and powerful way, spoken communication=> chưa đề cập, phải dùng verbal hoặc hay hơn là verbal socializing vân khá ổn is the best way. When spoken communication=> when spoken communicating mới đúng nhưng mà nên bỏ luôn vì chưa đề cập như trên cũng như là nên bỏ vì luôn câu trước đã nói rồi người đọc vẫn hiểu , we can more easily understand the other's feelings which makes it easier=> tránh lặp từ easy : helps collapse the barrier and creating condition for us to talk and understand each other. When it comes to presidential elections, we usually think of speeches or debates. In these situations, it is not enough just to give a good speech, but they must know how to express it with convincing and enthusiastic words in order to elected.

On the other hand written communication is also a useful way. Large businesses often receive a lot of requests or feedback from customers and they need to talk to them. In stead=> Instead cẩn thận sai chính tả là cái sai ngốc nhất trong writing of having to meet each person to talk to them, we can reply to them by email, facebook and so on. By that way, we can convey information to them quickly without having to spend a lot of time. In addition, most legal matters are communicated in writing because it ensures high reliability. Because=> the reason is that once you have sent an email message, you can not edit it anymore.

In short=> đúng nhưng mà dùng In conclusion vì mang tính học thuật cao hơn giúp band cao hơn nè, although oral=> mình đã không nhắc đến giao tiếp nói rồi thì không có liên quan gì đến nó nữa nha, rõ là đang nói về verbal liên quan tới mạng chứ có phải là giao tiếp nói đâu mà lị, sửa thành verbal communication is very powerful=> lặp từ nên dùng thành popular, widely used ...., i am of the opinion that written communication is equally important.
Bài viết nhìn chung ổn, khá tốt, cần bổ sung thêm những dẫn chứng ví dụ cụ thể nhưng đừng viết quá dài nha, nên sử dụng nhiều câu bị động để miêu tả về vấn đề đang bàn luận hơn cũng như kết hợp học hỏi và vận dụng các từ cụm từ academic và cấu trúc ngữ pháp khác nè, bài này nếu bổ sung thêm các ví dụ thì mới đủ số từ quy định bạn nhe chư snayx giwof mình sửa chắc rơi rớt hết rồi