English THPT mn giúp em sửa bài writing này với ạ

[Trương Huỳnh Tiên]

[TẶNG BẠN] TRỌN BỘ Bí kíp học tốt 08 môn
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Hello everyone! My name's Tien. I'm 15 years old. I study in class 10A5 at Nguyen Khuyen High school. I live in Phu Thuan village. I was fortunate to be born into a small and extremely happy family of 3 members: my father, my mother, and I. My mother is a housewife. My father is a security guard. In my free time, I often spend a lot of time listening to music. Because it is an excellent way to relax after a long working day. In the future, I would like to become a doctor. However, becoming a doctor it's not an easy journey. Doctors must have a strong character, brave, and be balanced to react quickly in emergency situations and to cope with stress. I will study well and try my best to make my dream come true.

 

[Bút Bi Tím]

Hello everyone! My name's Tien. I'm 15 years old. I study in class 10A5 at Nguyen Khuyen High school. I live in Phu Thuan village. I was fortunate to be born into a small and extremely happy family of 3 members: my father, my mother, and I. My mother is a housewife. My father is a security guard. In my free time, I often spend a lot of time listening to music. Because it is an excellent way to relax after a long working day. In the future, I would like to become a doctor. However, becoming a doctor it's not an easy journey. Doctors must have a strong character, brave, and be balanced to react quickly in emergency situations and to cope with stress. I will study well and try my best to make my dream come true.

Trương Huỳnh TiênPhần anh tô đậm là phần em xem lại.
Em vẫn không nghĩ ra cách sửa thì anh sẽ sửa cho em.