English THCS Fix lỗi sai

Jennifer Lu

Học sinh
Thành viên
30 Tháng mười hai 2020
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Thcs Hòa Hiếu 2
[TẶNG BẠN] TRỌN BỘ Bí kíp học tốt 08 môn
Chắc suất Đại học top - Giữ chỗ ngay!!

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Bài 1:
I’m a person who has many friends, so taking part in many parties is a normal thing. However, the most meaningful party to me is the party that my younger sister held for me. It was back in 2019 when I passed the university examination and immediately got admitted to Foreigner Trade university, which came as a surprise to all of my family. Therefore, to mark my resounding success as well as my turning point in life, my younger sister- Alen, and my parents celebrated my 18th birthday.
It seemed like a family dinner because there were only involved my own family and my grandparents. However, Alen still tried her best to make it become one of the most unforgettable events of my life by cooking many kinds of dishes that I adored. On top of that, she also invited a music band to perform many of my favorite songs, which made the atmosphere at that particular moment become cozier than ever before. In the end, everyone sang the birthday song when I cut the cake. They congratulated me and wished me a successful college life ahead. Then we ate cake and had a good feast together.
I would say that it was the birthday party that I had ever had in life. Though the party was not featured, it is still the most treasured memorable moment I could have.
Bài 2:
Nowadays, due to the advancement of technology, it is easy to get information with one click. There are many sources for individuals to find information such as websites, news, television, etc. However, sometimes this information misleads or misleads us. And I also faced such a situation when I found recruitment information.
It was back in 2019. After I graduated from The University of California, Los Angeles, I was free at home and I spent my time searching for a job according to my qualification. Luckily, one day, I saw an advertisement for Jamestown hight school that needs a mathematics teacher. I found it was a suitable job for me. So I signed in to the website of this college and applied for this position. At the time I had invested 450 dollars in registration fees.
After getting registered, I received a confirmation email, in which they disclose the interview date was 2nd June. Therefore, I went to 204 Shenango St, Jamestown, Pennsylvania with my friend for my interview. But Unfortunately, there was no one at the venue place. I asked the receptionist job interview and she retorted sorry there was no interview, maybe you got incorrect information. also, I showed my confirmation letter to her, then she told me, it was a problem with printing but the interview was on 20th June, not 2nd June.
I felt very disappointed at that time because of some staff members' negligence I wasted my time as well as money. I learned a lesson from it, do not believe blindly in anyone. hence, that was a situation when I received the wrong information.
Nhờ mọi người sửa lỗi sai giùm ạ:):):):)
 

minhtam8a2@gmail.com

Học sinh gương mẫu
Thành viên
12 Tháng hai 2016
521
1
2,580
326
16
Bình Định
THCS Ghềnh Ráng
Bài 1:
I’m a person who has many friends, so taking part in many parties is a normal thing. However, the most meaningful party to me is the party that my younger sister held for me. It was back in 2019 when I passed the university examination and immediately got admitted to Foreigner Trade university, which came as a surprise to all of my family. Therefore, to mark my resounding success as well as my turning point in life, my younger sister- Alen, and my parents celebrated my 18th birthday.
It seemed like a family dinner because there were only involved my own family and my grandparents. However, Alen still tried her best to make it become one of the most unforgettable events of my life by cooking many kinds of dishes that I adored. On top of that, she also invited a music band to perform many of my favorite songs, which made the atmosphere at that particular moment become cozier than ever before. In the end, everyone sang the birthday song when I cut the cake. They congratulated me and wished me a successful college life ahead. Then we ate cake and had a good feast together.
I would say that it was the birthday party that I had ever had in life. Though the party was not featured, it is still the most treasured memorable moment (*) I could have.
(*) chỗ này nên thêm end vào giữa hai tính từ vì trước danh từ đều được sắp xếp theo các kiểu opinion trước rôi tới size, aged, shape..... mà hai tính tư trên đều là tính từ ở nhóm opinion nên để tránh bất kì lỗi lầm thần bí nào đó tốt nhất nên dùng and.
Nhận xét viết trên: bài này hầu nư không sai chính tả hay chia thì hay ngữ pháp gì cả, tuy nhiên hiện tượng lặp từ và sử dụng câu chủ động khá nhiều làm bài viets trởn nên chán và không thu hút được người đọc cho lắm thay vì viết câu chủ đọng thì thay thế bằng câu bị động để nhấn mạnh được ý mà người viết muốn nói hơn.

Bài 2:
Nowadays, due to the advancement of technology, it is easy to get information with one click. There are many sources for individuals to find information such as websites, news, television, etc. However, sometimes this information misleads or misleads=> một mí leads thôi chứ bạn us. And=> không dùng and đầu câu nha vì đây ko phải là một liên từ conjunction thay bằng additionally hoặc bỏ luôn cx ko sao I also faced such a situation when I found recruitment information.
It was back in 2019. After I graduated from The University of California, Los Angeles, I was free at home and I spent my time searching for a job according to my qualification. Luckily, one day, I saw an advertisement for Jamestown hight=> high(cẩn thận đừng sai mấy lỗi cơ bản này nhé, mất điểm oan lắm) school that needs a mathematics teacher. I found it was a suitable job for me. So=> ko đứng đầu câu vì không phải lieent ừ nối câu này vs câu trước thay bằng therefore hoặc là từ gì có nghão tương tự mà ban biết I signed in to the website of this college and applied for this position. At the time I had invested 450 dollars in registration fees.
After getting registered, I received a confirmation email, in which they disclose the interview date was 2nd June. Therefore, I went to 204 Shenango St, Jamestown, Pennsylvania with my friend for my interview. But Unfortunately, there was no one at the venue place. I asked the receptionist job interview and she retorted sorry=> sorry ko phải adv hay noun thì ko đứng sau vẻb nhé, thay bằng' the apology that ' there was no interview, maybe you got incorrect information. also, I showed my confirmation letter to her, then she told me, it was a problem with printing but the interview was on 20th June, not 2nd June.
I felt very disappointed at that time because of some staff members' negligence I wasted my time as well as money. I learned a lesson from it, do not believe blindly in anyone. hence, that was a situation when I received the wrong information.
Mấy bài này có ý viết hay lắm luôn í:>>>>
 
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